Tired, Just Tired
By Kathy Koches
Some days I find I am just tired. I’m not talking about when I don’t get a good night’s sleep, or when I try to do too much in one day. I’m talking about feeling overwhelmingly tired. Most people know me as the “FBBOH” (the freakin’ blue bird of happiness), always cheerful, chirpy, energetic. My kids call me “Mom Cheerleader.” But every now and then I just want to step down from that persona, and say “not today.”
Sure, when I am sick, or taking care of a loved one, that takes extra energy. And yes, I do over schedule myself, take on too much and get over-extended. But what about days when I don’t even want to get out of my jammies? When I just want to sit and stare at the lake and think about nothing in particular?
I think of those times as “recharging my batteries.” Some days I just need to absorb the beauty of where I am and just “be.” The old cliché “Stop and smell the roses” comes to mind. Some days I just need to take a step back, smell those roses, appreciate my surroundings, and let it all go. And sometimes that is hard for me to do. I never really thought of myself as an “A” type personality, but apparently all of my family and friends do. When I told my sister, my daughter, and my friends about my recent medical scare, each and every one of them said to me, “Oh, this was a wake-up call, telling you that you need to slow down.” NO, that is NOT what this was! It had NOTHING at all to do with how much or how little I do – it was a virus, pure, plain and simple (ok, not so simple, but still just a virus.)
But it got me thinking – is that really how everyone else sees me? And if so, is it true? Do I need to step back, regroup, reassess and perhaps, just perhaps, learn to say no once in awhile? That is something I am really going to have to think about. Meanwhile, I think the FBBOH has flown south for a vacation. And me? I’m going back to bed.