ONLY IN MEXICO (Perhaps)
By Tom Clarkson
All in the same week might you experience:
—While waiting for your muffler to get fixed, ending up playing with your mechanic’s children and a baby Tejón.
—Seeing a guy trimming his toenails with a foot and a half long machete.
—While enjoying a drink on a beach seeing a stampede of cattle race past pursued by men on horseback.
—Dogs welcomed with their owners in most restaurants and certainly those that are on the beach.
—Might you use the three words “burritos,” “banos” and “baracho” all in the same place – possibly in the same sentence.
—Could three guys named Jesus cut your hair, water your plants and clean your pool.
—Your doctor spending the first half an hour talking about your family, your tropical garden and mutually appreciated eating establishments before inquiring about your health.
—The realization that you should – at no time – expect any particular product to be at any specific store at any given time.
—A car coming toward you on a one-way street racing full-out in reverse.
—It not being considered abnormal conduct for someone sitting next to you in an outdoor beach palapa restaurant to pull a snake out of his knapsack and start playing with it.
—Can you drive down the road, note a Topes Sign, carefully slow down, only to find out none exists in the area marked, hence re-accelerating to cruising speed just in time to hit one larger than a ’49 Hudson that’s not marked nor painted yellow.
—It not surprising to walk into your bathroom and find it already occupied by a large green iguana.
—Total entertainment, during the red stop light, in the middle of town, by a juggler, fire eater or clown.
—Is any prominently placed clock on the wall in a bank or hospital not necessarily expected to be working.