Joyful Musings – December 2012

Joyful Musings

By Joy Birnbach Dunstan, MA, LPC, MAC

The Sixth Sense



Joy-4-11We’re all aware of our five basic senses, but there’s a sixth one that is every bit as important: the sense of humor. The ability to laugh helps us cope and find a smile, even in the most difficult of times.

Many cultures throughout the world designate a day to humor.  People in the U.S. and Canada, as well as many other countries, celebrate April 1—April Fool’s Day—by playing good-natured pranks on one another.

Mexico’s counterpart of April Fool’s Day is observed on December 28. and is called “Día de los Inocentes,” or Day of the Innocent Ones. Originally, the day was a sad remembrance of the slaughter of innocent children by King Herod. It eventually evolved into a lighter commemoration involving pranks and trickery.

In the spirit of humor, I’d like to share a good-natured recent exchange I had with a devoted fan.


Dear Ms. Dunstan,

I read your column, and although I am 85 years old (some would call me elderly), I act and look as if I were 50. It is perturbing to some, and I’ve been accused of partaking of the ‘uplift’ — boob, lip, eye, gut and/or tush.  I’ve had none of the aforementioned. It’s distressing to me that because I have thick golden hair (my own) and look really good from the rear, I am taken for a 30-year-old. But when I am face-to-face with a young person (male) they seem startled to see that I am in fact older than they expected, albeit by not so much.

How can I meet nice gentlemen my own age without the awkwardness that is inevitable when my knees give out or I can’t remember where I put my bra (or even the intrinsic value and use for same).

Any advice would be much appreciated. Yours truly,



Dear Charlene,

First of all, let me applaud you for your healthy spirit and joie de vivre.  Regarding your difficulty finding men of a shared and accepting spirit, I suggest you stop looking for men your own age or even close to it.  Grab yourself a mature healthy stud in his 20s.  Instead of being disappointed by your advanced age, he will be awed by the wisdom of your years, find your eccentricities entrancing, and be blown away by the many enticing things you can teach him in the bedroom.  Given the difference in male vs. female aging, you will both get ‘old’ at about the same time.

Now, go get ‘im, girl!  Have fun!

With admiration,

Ms. Dunstan


Dear Ms. Dunstan,

I thank you so much. I think I already have the stud picked out. Your encouragement gives me courage to pursue the dude.


P.S. What tricks do you think he should be shown?

P.P.S. On second thought, best not to answer that.

P.P.P.S.  I’ll just give him Fifty Shades of Grey to read and let the tricks fall where they may.


My dear Charlene,

Have a wonderful time with Sr. Guapo, but I suggest you refrain from any ‘tricks.’  Those are only done for appropriate payment.  I’m sure you’ll know just how to show him the ropes, and after he reads Shades of Grey, he’ll know what to do with them.


Ms. D


William James once said, “Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at different speeds.“ A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.”  So dance a little, and add a few smiles to your day.

Editor’s Note: Joy is a practicing psychotherapist in Riberas. She can be contacted at or 765-4988. Check out her new website:


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Ojo Del Lago
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