Dear Portia


(Ed. Note: Wherein Portia gets a couple of things off her, um, chest.)


Old-lady-on-doorstep-with-cigarDear Readers:

For those sloshed cry-babies who think the drunk driving laws in the United States, Canada and Mexico are too tough, I offer the following examples of how some other countries sober up those overgrown children who like to party behind the wheel of a car.

Australia: Names of the drivers are sent to local newspaper and printed under the heading: “He’s drunk and in jail.”

Belgium: Jail sentence of up to six months, and license revoked for as long as five years.

Bulgaria: A second conviction results in execution.

Chile: Alcoholism is considered hereditary, and children of drunk drivers are not permitted to have a driver’s license.

Finland: Those who are found to have an alcohol level of .05 are sentenced to hard labor on a rock pile for three months. If alcohol level is higher, the sentence can stretch to two years.

France: One year in jail, three-year suspension of license, and a $1,000 fine.

Malaysia: The driver is jailed?and if he is married, his wife is also thrown into the joint.

Norway: If second offense occurs within five years of first, license revoked for life.

Poland: Drunk drivers are jailed, fined and forced to attend political lectures. (Back in the days of Communism, this latter punishment might have been as grueling as working on a chain gang.)

Russia: License revoked for life. If injuries occur due to drunk driving, culprit can be executed by firing squad.

South Africa: Ten years in prison, or $2,000 fine, or both.

Turkey: Drunk drivers are taken miles outside town, and forced to walk back under police escort.

EI Salvador: First offense is the last. Execution by firing squad.

Here in Mexico, the drunk driving laws are getting tougher. Foreigners with recent (in the past 10 years) drunk-driving criminal convictions are generally refused entry at the border. Mexico’s Immigration Act section 36 considers any foreign drinking and driving outstanding charge or conviction as an Indictable offense (similar to a felony).So when getting behind the wheel of a car, make sure you’re sober enough to drive. The life you save will probably be that of a far better person than you are!

For more information about Lake Chapala visit:

Ojo Del Lago
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